Husband wants me to pay all the bills
My sincere greeting to you. I met a Jamaican man in the UK, and we started dating, then finally we got married after a while. The bombshell came as he wanted to send for his children. Well, the home was not big enough and I have children. Plus, this was not discussed with me before we got married. But his family's thoughts were that his children must live with us, as they are his children and they came as a package.
He sent for them, but they ended up living with his brother because he had enough space. But things have gone bad because his daughter is now pregnant, and all his money is spent on his children. Don't get me wrong, I would never stop him from supporting his children, but now he doesn't want to contribute in our home where he is living.
I feel as if I was used by him to get married, for him to get his stay in the country and then send for his children. I have put him out and I am getting on with my life, but he refuses to grant me a divorce. He is saying that he doesn't believe in divorce.
Please, can you advise me on what I can do? I await your reply.
Your husband's relatives should not meddle in the relationship with you and your husband. It is unfortunate that both of you did not discuss before you got married whether he would want his children to live with the both of you. However, you had no objection with him sponsoring his children to the UK.
It is unfortunate that his daughter became pregnant and that this has caused him to be spending a large amount of his money on her to the extent that he has not been able to maintain your home, where he lives. I doubt very much that you would have asked him to leave if you were satisfied with the way the relationship was going.
I suggest that both of you should try to make an appointment to see a family counsellor. Divorce should be a last resort. So, go step by step. See a
family counsellor, and if your husband
continues to neglect his responsibility to your home, you may discuss the
matter with a lawyer.