I'm fat and my penis is shrinking

by

February 13, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am writing you because I have a problem. I am 35 years old and my girlfriend is 30. We have been friends for three years but I have put on a lot of weight. My girlfriend is fussing and telling me that I should take off the weight, because since I have got very heavy my penis has shrunk. She said that she is not enjoying me as much as before.

When she first told me that, I felt embarrassed and I accused her of cheating on me. But she convinced me that it was far from the truth. I asked one of her friends about it. She said that doctor told her that fat men have shorter penis.

We don't live together, but sometimes I stay with her when she has her weekends off. When she cooks, she only gives me 'green' as if I am an animal. I love her very much and I don't want to lose her. She told me that if I don't take off the weight she is going to leave me.

I bought some jerk pork and she gave it away. I was very hurt but I cooled down. Whenever we are getting marriedp I would like you to perform the ceremony.

Fat Man

Dear Fat Man,

It is a fact that when a man is overweight and has a heavy belly the length of his penis is affected. Some men are so grossly overweight that they cannot see their penis. So your girlfriend is quite correct in trying to encourage you to reduce your weight.

You probably need to see a doctor and ask him to put you on a reducing diet. When last have you seen a urologist? I would suggest that you visit one very soon. Don't get angry with your woman. She is only trying to help you.

Pastor

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