My friend is a stalker


March 14, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am 23 years old and my boyfriend is 46 years old. We met through one of his coworkers. We have been together for almost nine months. The problem is that his co-worker started to tell both of us lies a month after my boyfriend and I got together. I did know what she was saying about me, and he doesn't know, either.

During last year's Thanksgiving season, I started to become worried that I was doing something wrong and would end up hurting myself. So, one night I asked him about all the things she told me about him, and to my surprise, he told me all the things she said about me, which were all lies. I know he is telling the truth because she even mentioned one day, when we went to get the title to my car, that we went to meet a man who I was seeing. But in fact, she knew that we went to a car dealership and the sales rep was waiting on me since we got lost going there.

Afterwards, she started to tell people at her workplace about our relationship, and because we work in proximity to each other, people at my workplace started to talk about our relationship and adding their two cents in everything, even our age difference.

We got tired of this. So we came up with a plan after I told her to stop spreading our relationship around. I told her that we broke up. I told her this like 7 a.m. the following morning and by 7:15 a.m. the same morning, people started to talk about it at her workplace. She took no part in blaming herself for anything.

Shortly after, her husband broke up with her and then she became even more vicious and evil.

Recently, I was leaving work, and I noticed that someone was following me. I realised that it was her. I had to stop and talk to her, and I let her believe I would trail her to where ever she was going. So I let her get off at that exit and then I drove like crazy on the highway to get home. I have moved from where I used to live, and now she is trying to know where I live and trying to get my numbers. And on top of all that, she wants me to rent an apartment with her.

I have not confronted her with the lies she told my boyfriend and I. I have asked her the truth about simple things and she lied about that, too. I am shocked that she is a Jamaican. In fact, she was the first person I met when I came here in the States about 10 months ago. I have no family in this part of the States, and that is why I was so attached to her even though she has been here for many years.

She calls my workplace trying to find out when I am off and what time I am coming to work each day. I started to feel terrified about her. My boyfriend and I are planning to get married, and then I want to shock her with the news and let her know that we never broke up in the first place. But then thinking about it, she may try to kill us.

Pastor, please help me and tell me what to do to get rid of her.

May the lord keep blessing you.


Dear M.A,

You are paying too much attention to this woman. You should tell her straight up that you do not care to have her as a friend. And tell your boyfriend that he should totally ignore her. He should also let her know that if she does not stop harassing you and your man, both of you will put a restraining order on her.


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