My girlfriend won't stop bleaching


September 08, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am living with a woman who is seven years my junior. When we got together, she was already pregnant for another man, but he accused her of cheating because he believed that her friends would not tell lies on her.

When she told me she was pregnant and it was that man who got her pregnant, I could not believe it because he is a rough-looking man.

I told her to come and live with me. Then she found out that her mother had told the man that he should not believe her; she said it was a jacket she was giving him. So, the man left her.

After the child was born, the child didn't have anything for the man. I supported her and I sent her back to school.

Then, after the child was one year old, the man asked her for the child, and behind my back, she handed the child over to him.


She started to bleach. I asked her why and she said she did not like her complexion. She would take my money and buy the ointment and put it all over her body.

I even caught her bleaching her private part! I asked her who would see her private part other than me.

She is not as attractive as before and she has turned out to be a big party girl. She doesn't listen to me anymore.

I told her to leave my house. She has my name all over the place, telling people that I am not a good man.

She told people that I want her to leave because I cannot give her good sex and she complained about it.

Her complexion has become so light now, she does not look like the woman I met, was sorry for, and took into my house.

She is even selling sex on the street.

Am I wrong to tell her to go? I am giving her 14 days to leave my place.


Dear B.W.,

This woman is not going to stop her bleaching because she believes that bleaching makes her look beautiful. She wants to have a lighter complexion.

Regardless of what you say to her, that will not change her. You are not prepared to tolerate what she is doing, therefore, you should tell her to go. Have no fuss with this woman.

You can go about the separation in two ways. One, you could ask a doctor to speak to her and to show her why it is unwise to bleach her skin. Two, you could also make an appointment to see a family counsellor and discuss your relationship with her.

If she is not willing to change, then you should part company.


Other Tell Me Pastor Stories